There are many, many love songs out there in the universe that I sometimes like to think that 99% of the songs ever made are about love or some form of it. In 1999, a monumental project brought on by Stephin Merritt and his band The Magnetic Fields was released. It was called 69 Love Songs and that’s exactly what the album is: sixty-nine songs about love.
Turning 25 years old in September, I thought I would listen to the album in its entirety for the first time and offer my analysis on all sixty-nine tracks (the album clocks in at two hours and fifty-two minutes). This is 69 Thoughts on 69 Love Songs.
Disc 1
“Absolutely Cuckoo”
What everyone thought Stephin Merritt was when he decided to take on this project (probably).
“I Don’t Believe in the Sun”
The first sad song on the album about a breakup, Merritt sings about the sun and its power to lighten up the narrator’s world, which has gone dark since their love went away. A sweet and melancholy track.
“All My Little Words”
A new word that needs to be added to the OED: unboyfriendable. This song is about the futile attempts to make someone stay with them.
“A Chicken With Its Head Cut Off”
A metaphor for a wandering heart, it’s a simple song about falling in and out of love with everyone and everything.
“Reno Dakota”
“Reno Dakota” is sung by Magnetic Fields member Claudia Gonson and is a short, banjo-forward song about the title person who only makes the subject feeling sad.
“I Don’t Want to Get Over You”
Pretty self-explanatory, the song is about trying to get over someone but really not wanting to accept that fact that it’s over. This is the first song on the album that I've heard previously before taking on this quest.
“Come Back From San Francisco”
Shirley Simms sings on this track about wanting someone to come back to them, only to realize that they don’t need them as much as they do.
“The Luckiest Guy on the Lower East Side”
The Luckiest Guy on the Lower East Side is a man who doesn’t have what other guys have, but he has a car and I guess none of the others do.
“Let’s Pretend We’re Bunny Rabbits”
🐰🐰🐰
“The Cactus Where Your Heart Should Be”
The song is about an emotionally unavailable partner whom the narrator still loves. Simple and somber, I love the lyrics.
“I Think I Need a New Heart”
Don’t we all?
“The Book of Love”
Perhaps the most popular song on the album (and maybe of the Magnetic Fields’ discography), it’s a beautiful song about how love is essential to most people’s lives.
“Fido, Your Leash is Too Long”
Men are dogs (according to the metaphor) and this song is about giving a person too much power and needing to shorten their metaphorical leash.
“How Fucking Romantic”
Just a few things listed that are romantic, even though you don’t care.
“The One You Really Love”
A sad little song about unrequited love.
“Punk Love”
You wouldn’t understand.
“Parades Go By”
One of my favorites on this album, this song is told from the perspective of a dead narrator.
“Boa Constrictor”
Love is like a snake.
“A Pretty Girl is Like”
Mess with the wrong person and, well, you may get yourself in trouble.
“My Sentimental Melody”
A song from the point of view of a hopeless romantic.
“Nothing Matters When We’re Dancing”
The world stops when two people dance.
“Sweet Lovin’ Man”
A good man is hard to find.
“The Things We Did and Didn’t Do”
Relationships can be confusing.
Disc 2
“Roses”
Buy more stock in roses
Millionaires will always woo
Don't be shocked if roses
Make a millionaire of you
“Love is Like Jazz”
Jazzy. 🎶
“When My Boy Walks Down the Street”
A lovely queer love song.
“Time Enough for Rocking When We’re Old”
Growing old with someone you love: What could be better? But tonight, let’s dance.
“Very Funny”
You love me? Yeah, right.
“Grand Canyon”
Offering to change who someone is for a partner, but realizing it’s probably not a good idea.
“No One Will Ever Love You”
Oh damn.
“If You Don’t Cry”
If love doesn’t make you cry, what’s the point? This song reminds me of Rilo Kiley.
“You’re My Only Home”
💔
“(Crazy For You But) Not That Crazy”
I love you a lot, but it’s not a crazy amount or anything.
“My Only Friend”
An ode to Billie Holiday, Merritt sings of losing love and retreating to listening to her music.
“Promises of Eternity”
What if we broke up? What would the world be like? Let’s not find out.
“World Love”
Love, music, wine, and revolution.
“Washington, D.C.”
The second location song on the album, the narrator loves the city because that’s where their love resides.
“Long-Forgotten Fairytale”
A modern-day fairytale, disturbing, but nonetheless.
“Kiss Me Like You Mean It”
A gospel song of sorts.
“Papa Was a Rodeo”
This sounds like a pseudo-country ballad, like an Orville Peck song.
“Epitaph For My Heart”
A breakup song about what happens when your heart is broken beyond repair.
“Asleep and Dreaming”
Just a song about watching someone sleeping and thinking it’s so beautiful.
“The Sun Goes Down and the World Goes Dancing”
An upbeat and catchy song about just wanting to go dancing.
“The Way You Say Good-Night”
About being enamored by someone so beautiful and wonderful.
“Abigail, Belle of Kilronan”
The narrator needs to leave their love to fight a war—and for her.
“I Shatter”
Probably the deepest-sounding voice of Stephin Merritt’s already baritone range, it’s a devastating one.
Disc 3
“Underwear”
Sung in English and French, this song reminds me of a Pulp song (which is funny because they also have a song of the same name).
“It’s a Crime”
Love is hard, but I’m going to smile through it and no one will know how sad I am.
“Busby Berkeley Dreams”
Busby Berkeley was a choreographer who produced many dance numbers for Hollywood films in the 1930s and 1940s. Merritt sings of a long-lost love he still pines for but dreams of them dancing.
“I’m Sorry I Love You”
Apologizing for loving someone? Nonsense!
“Acoustic Guitar”
An ode to the acoustic guitar and hopes of bringing back the narrator’s girl.
“The Death of Ferdinand de Saussure”
Ferdinand de Saussure was a modernist linguist. In the song, he and the narrator talk about love, whom either can’t figure out.
“Love in the Shadows”
Love at night is mysterious and cool, but reader be warned.
“Bitter Tears”
An ode to the cathartic nature of a good cry.
“Wi’ Nae Wee Bairn Ye’ll Me Beget”
The title translates to “with no small child you’ll me beget” and is sung in the perspective of a woman, who is not going to have a child with the man of the song.
“Yeah! Oh, Yeah!”
A duet between Claudia Gonson and Merritt, it’s basically asking if they’re breaking up and the answer is “Yeah! Oh, yeah!”
“Experimental Music Love”
An experimental music love song. An interlude of sorts.
“Meaningless”
Realizing a relationship’s end wasn’t worth anything.
“Love is Like a Bottle of Gin”
Comparing love to a bottle of gin and the drunken effects of both.
“Queen of the Savages”
A ukulele tune about a savage girl.
“Blue You”
A blue song about you.
“I Can’t Touch You Anymore”
The narrator still loves someone but realizes there’s a lot to hate the person for.
“Two Kinds of People”
There are two kinds of people: us and everyone else.
“How to Say Goodbye”
About losing a love and coming to terms that it’s over for good.
“The Night You Can’t Remember”
Remembering a special night you can’t forget to only learn it meant nothing to someone else.
“For We Are the King of Boudoir”
Performed on a harpsichord, it’s a song sung in medieval-style.
“Strange Eyes”
A song focusing on someone’s eyes and their powers.
“Xylophone Track”
The narrator sings to their mother in letter format, they’ve died from the blues.
“Zebra”
You if you really loved me, you’d give me a zebra.
And you too can have a listen if you’ve got three hours to spare. (It’s worth it, I promise.)